Forty-five years!

But God is my rock

Psalm 144:1-2, 15 Praise the Lord, who is my rock. … He is my loving ally and my fortress, my tower of safety, my rescuer. He is my shield, and I take refuge in him. … Joyful are those whose God is the Lord.

As I began to write the post for today, I noticed one from August 27, 2019. Three years ago, pre-Covid, pre-so many things. But it’s still true, and worth re-posting. Just substitute 45 years for 42.

At a family picnic Saturday celebrating 45 years

“Forty-two [forty-five] years ago, surrounded by family and friends, flowers and music, Dave and I said “I do” on the shore of a lovely lake in Wisconsin. We had no idea that day of what would unfold in this less-than-perfect union. We didn’t know how vulnerable we were to the troubles the enemy of our souls plotted against us.

“Last week a friend who was aware of the high divorce statistics for couples with a chronically ill child, and especially, she told me, those whose child is expected to die but then doesn’t, asked me how we had held our marriage together. I laughed at the question. Did she really think Dave and I had been able to do this? No way. There were so many other factors besides Karis’s illness arrayed against us, beginning with the ways our parents’ marriages had affected us and the ways our personalities meshed to form what Dave calls the “perfect storm.” Had it depended just on us, we wouldn’t be together today.

“So we celebrate today the fact that the Lord helped us, through the support of friends and family, and the skills of excellent counselors. But, I told my friend, one of the main ways God helped us is by giving Dave a streak of stubbornness. He was determined to do whatever it took to rescue this marriage, after I, frankly, had given up. His was the energy behind the hard work we both did over a couple of intense years to repair what had worn out and broken.

“Today, in the joy and comfort of a forty-two [forty-five]-year-old marriage that has been through fire and flood, yet survived because of the Lord’s multilayered help, I want to say thank you to my husband for believing so stubbornly in ‘us.’”

Missing April and our granddog June who couldn’t be with us Saturday

Today, three years after writing this, I’m still grateful to Dave. And to the Lord, who is my rock, my loving ally, my fortress, my tower of safety, my rescuer, my shield, my joy.

3 thoughts on “Forty-five years!

  1. Dear Deb and David, Thank you so much for your beautiful reflection on your marriage with such openness and honesty. I was particularly struck by the knowledge that God is the crucial ingredient in any and every relationship where Love lives. To acknowledge the strong part that God has in your lives continues to be inspirational and delivers the message to others of trusting in the power and faith in letting God be our guide as best we can which keeps growing as we grow ourselves. Thank you for sharing your own personal growth with others so well. Meredith

    Liked by 1 person

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