John 4:47-50 [A government official’s son was very sick.] When he heard that Jesus had come from Judea to Galilee, he went and begged Jesus to come to Capernaum to heal his son, who was about to die. Jesus asked, “Will you never believe in me unless you see miraculous signs and wonders?” The official pleaded, “Lord, please come now before my little boy dies.” Then Jesus told him, “Go back home. Your son will live!” And the man believed what Jesus said and started home.
John 20:27-29 Jesus said to Thomas, “Put your finger here and look at my hands. Put your hand into the wound in my side. Don’t be faithless any longer. Believe!”
1 Peter 1:8 You love him even though you have never seen him. Though you do not see him now, you trust him; and you rejoice with a glorious, inexpressible joy.
First signs of Spring! Its here!!
Karis was in high school, missing as many school days at her school in Brazil as she was able to attend, increasingly hampered by severe symptoms of bowel dysfunction. Her doctor in the U.S. retired. (Retired! Didn’t he understand how much we depended on him?!) His partner refused to take on Karis’s care, along with a disheartening parade of Brazilian doctors.
And I failed the faith test. When Dr. P disappeared from our lives, I felt like GOD disappeared. I felt abandoned and alone. Because I couldn’t see God caring for Karis, I struggled with belief. For months.
By then, every member of our family was deeply immersed in our life in Brazil. And even if I did take Karis to the U.S., where would I take her? If the doctor who knew Karis best—Dr. P’s partner—thought her case was too perplexing for him, what hope was there that anyone else would take her on? She didn’t have the energy to travel around the U.S. trying to find a doctor who could understand her unique situation. Many people prayed for her healing. Nothing changed.
As I grew more discouraged, it seemed Karis’s faith grew stronger. She trusted her Father, and experienced the joy Peter describes. She gamely visited yet one more physician in São Paulo, submitted to the exams, listened courteously to one more doctor tell her he couldn’t help her, and on the way home did her best to comfort me.
So, I feel great empathy for both the official in John 4 and for Thomas. And eventually, like Thomas, I was able to hear and respond to Jesus telling me, “Don’t be faithless any longer. Believe!”
Remembering that experience strengthened me for later faith challenges—and heightened my appreciation of the times God generously let me see him at work. Pure mercy.
Hosea14:8 [The Lord says] Stay away from idols! I am the one who answers your prayers and cares for you. I am like a tree that is always green; all your fruit comes from me.
John 15:5 [Jesus said] I am the vine; you are the branches. Those who remain in me, and I in them, will produce much fruit. For apart from me you can do nothing.
Shutterstock: MVolodymyr
We’re home from our vacation, spent tucked away in a small town in Ohio. For two weeks, Dave and I delighted in extended devotional times, hiked in the snow and cold, played games, built jigsaw puzzles, read books, had important conversations, slept (!), and watched a few movies. We are grateful for this restorative time, balancing and healing the intense stress of the last weeks of 2024. The challenge now will be not to get sucked back into running on adrenaline 24/7, as we are both committed to big projects in 2025.
I found myself drawn to the prophets, particularly the minor prophets, those I don’t often read or pay attention to. So from now to Easter, I plan to deep dive for “pearls” from the prophets to share with you.
In light of the work Dave and I believe God has called us to, I chose Hosea 14:8, quoted above, as my “year verse” for 2025. It reminds me of how easily I can get distracted from what God wants for me and make other things more important. These “idols” don’t yield good fruit. Neither do our own efforts, in themselves. The fruit in our lives comes from God, from his life active in us.
I would love for you to join me in exploring “pearls from the prophets”—not just reading my thoughts, but sharing your own as well.
Hebrews 10:38, 11:1 My righteous ones will live by faith. … Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see.
Hebrews 12:1-2 … Let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith.
Collage by my friend Carol Amidi CarolAmidi.net
Have you ever had your confidence in God severely threatened? Have you come to the end of your own ability to keep on believing?
Often, I have found, people make judgments about each other regarding the sincerity and adequacy of their faith.
The thing is, life can be very tough, and messy, and confusing, and painful. Not one of us is strong enough to maintain faith all by ourselves.
The good news is that God doesn’t ask this of us. He surrounds us with love and support—his own, and the Body of Christ. Hebrews 12, coming just after the litany of faithful ones in chapter 11, encourages us that even those who have gone before us are supporting and rooting for us.
I’ve found too that people still alive do this also—sometimes in completely unexpected ways. Here’s a treasured example.
If you’ve followed this blog, you know that our daughter Karis was born with nonfunctional intestines. Day after day in the hospital, test after test came back normal, yet even a teaspoon of fluid by slow drip into her stomach prompted bilious vomiting, and nothing at all came out as waste. When the surgeons finally opened her up and biopsied her intestinal tract, they asked us to remove all life support and let her die, because there was no hope that her intestine would ever function.
A missionary friend of Dave’s from Florida visited us on a trip to Chicago. The timing couldn’t have been better. Though Dave wasn’t there, Harold inspired enough confidence that I was able to confess I didn’t feel I had any faith left. Harold said two things. Faith is not grounded in circumstances. It’s grounded in the unchanging character of God. And, he said, if my faith was faltering, it was time for the Body of Christ to have faith for us.
I’ve never forgotten Harold’s compassionate words. I felt so cared for, so supported, so understood. He didn’t criticize me or blame me or require something of me. He asked me instead to let go. To let others share my burden. To rest in God’s immutable love, for Karis and for our family, and for all whom her little life touched.
Faith, I think, asks us to find courage to share our needs not just with God, but with each other. As Advent so quickly morphs into Christmas this year, I pray you find a trusted friend with whom you can do just that.
Hebrews 10:32-37 You suffered … and you accepted it with joy. You knew there were better things waiting for you that will last forever.
Philippians 4:4-9 Rejoice! … Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace. …
Yesterday I confided in a friend some of my worries. Though they hardly qualify as the suffering the author of Hebrews addresses, my friend helped me take my worries to the Lord. I came home with peace and enJOYed the rest of the day. I don’t yet know the outcome of my concerns, but I have a renewed sense of trust in the care of my Father.
On a walk this morning I thought of Habakkuk 3:17-19: the wonderful “Even though … yet” passage with which the prophet concludes his book of complaints. How would you personalize the verses of this song? Here are three of mine:
Even though the date (12/21) is simply unworkable for many people, yet I am confident those who can attend the Campfire Song Stories launch party this Saturday will have a delightful time and I’ll be able to express my gratitude to the artists and their families.
Even though I don’t know whether Karis can “see” the book from Heaven, yet it gives me joy to showcase her sense of humor.
Even though people have judged the book as expensive, yet those who have acquired it for their children have loved it.
Not very “spiritual,” right? But Paul doesn’t tell the Philippians they can only entrust to God their spiritual concerns. And Habakkuk’s list of “Even thoughs” has to do with fears about invaders, and about crops and flocks—his livelihood. This exercise allows him to “wait quietly” to see what God will do (3:16).
Try it out! Make a list of your “Even though” situations and tell God about them. With open hands and thankfulness, receive his peace.
Then join me in Habbakuk’s song of praise:
Yet I will rejoice in the Lord!
I will be joyful in the God of my salvation!
The Sovereign Lord is my strength!
He makes me as surefooted as a deer,
Able to tread upon the heights.
Habakkuk’s song includes an instruction to the choir director: “to be accompanied by stringed instruments.” So here you go: (Sovereign Lord, by Lantern Music)
Hebrews 13:5-6 God has said, “I will never fail you. I will never abandon you.” So we can say with confidence, “The Lord is my helper, so I will have no fear. What can mere people do to me?”
1 John 4:16-18 We know how much God loves us, and we have put our trust in his love. … Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear.”
Some people had trouble posting responses to the question in my last blog (no idea why—I hope it fixes itself) and wrote me by email. I asked Elaine whether I could quote part of what she wrote:
“Fearing God eliminates our other fears. As John says, his perfect love removes them. And Romans 8 is so beautiful in affirming that nothing can separate us from his love. So both of these things give me peace no matter what crazy and terrible things are going on.”
I’ve been thinking about this, and how it works in my life practically. Last week, I said to a friend, “I lived in fear for thirty years—the thirty years of Karis’s life. Her wellbeing turned on a dime. I walked in high alert. She could be well in the morning and fighting for her life in the ICU by afternoon. All plans were held loosely …”
Evaluate with me the statement that I “lived in fear for thirty years.” On the face of the Scriptures quoted above and Elaine’s affirmation, it seems I was telling my friend I didn’t trust God or his love. Some of the most profound hurts that I suffered were from people telling me (who didn’t live the Karis reality 24/7 or understand more than surface facts about what it entailed) that I was in sin because I was afraid.
Is it true that in my fear I didn’t trust God? I don’t think so. Is it possible there is a difference between fear in response to specific frightening circumstances, and fear as an existential state that bars us from the comfort God can give us? It was exactly because I trusted God that I could express my fears to him. I knew that HE would not stand apart and judge me or criticize my “spirituality.” He instead walked with me through the dark valleys.
Fear is, after all, an emotion that warns us of trouble or threat. It helps us recognize when all is not well; when action needs to be taken. Healthy, appropriate fear can save us from taking life-threatening risks. We teach our children not to run into the street without looking both ways, because cars can kill them. It’s appropriate to fear what wind and waves can do to us (yes, there are family stories behind this example, that involve exhaustion and jellyfish stings and … ). We call someone “foolhardy” when they choose to swim despite red high hazard signs on the beach (thinking of you, David Kornfield). Having no fear can literally kill us.
Another thought: Often fear is linked to our sense of impotence, our lack of control over circumstances or other people’s choices. Sometimes this leads to blaming God for things that happen to us or to people we care about. What does it mean to me in my everyday life that God is in control of the universe? Doesn’t he see me? If he loves me, and has all power, why doesn’t he act to remove my suffering or the suffering of others? This age-old question is called “theodicy.” Suffering forces us into asking these questions.
As you can tell, I’m not offering any pat answers here. I want to engage you in thinking more deeply about your own suffering, your own fears. And whether peace, biblical all-encompassing shalom, is a reality in your life, and if so, what pathway you walked to discover and experience the “perfect love that expels all fear.” Join the conversation!
Psalm 62:8 O my people, trust in God at all times. Pour out your heart to him, for he is our refuge.
Last Sunday I visited a church with my family. The sermon was about storms (from Acts 27), times when we might feel forsaken, and learning to remember God’s promises in those moments. Afterward, we sang the song “Trust in God” by Elevation Worship. As we sang, scenes from my entire life flashed before my eyes. I will copy the lyrics below, and I will fill in a few of these scenes, as I believe they are “But God” moments.
Blessed Assurance, Jesus is mine
He’s been my fourth man in the fire, time after time
Born of His Spirit, washed in His blood
And what He did for me on Calvary is more than enough
I trust in God, my Savior
The one who will never fail
He will never fail
Perfect submission, all is at rest
I know the author of tomorrow has ordered my steps
So this is my story and this is my song
I’m praising my risen King and Savior all the day long
He didn’t fail you then
He won’t fail you now
When I was three years old, afraid of going upstairs at night, and my sister Rachel taught me to sing “this little light of mine…”
With my sisters visiting our grandparents in Bolivia, Rachel (left), Karis (center)
I sought the Lord and He heard and He answered
When I was in first grade in Brazil, praying for the Lord to bring my mom and sister home safely from her surgery in the U.S…
I sought the Lord and He heard and He answered
When I was in second grade, afraid I would never have a friend, I learned Jesus could be my friend…
I sought the Lord and He heard and He answered
That’s why I trust Him, that’s why I trust Him
When I was at home at night working on a book report about The Hiding Place, and my dad rushed to the hospital to be with my mom as my sister might be dying…
I sought the Lord and He heard and He answered
When I was in middle school on a missions trip, so shy I could not open my mouth – the Lord gave me words to speak, and he gave me friends…
I sought the Lord and He heard and He answered
When I was in high school and the world had lost all color – because I could not see God’s love as my sister suffered in the ICU, so I could not believe in love, so I could not believe in God, then I decided…
I sought the Lord and He heard and He answered
That’s why I trust Him, that’s why I trust Him
When I was in high school, overwhelmed by living in different friends’ houses since my mom was in the U.S. with Karis for intestinal transplant and my dad traveled often, with the uncertainty of my sister’s illness and many giants too great for me to conquer, I found comfort in singing “GREAT is the Lord…”
I sought the Lord and He heard and He answered
When I was a freshman at Notre Dame, at a loss before all the staggering changes in my life – from a small school in Brazil to a large school in the U.S., I knew God remained the same, “Great is thy Faithfulness…”
I sought the Lord and He heard and He answered
When I was a sophomore at Notre Dame, at times feeling profoundly alone, I found a beautiful community of people from all over the world…
I sought the Lord and He heard and He answered
That’s why I trust Him, that’s why I trust Him
When I was a junior at Notre Dame, studying abroad in Italy, struggling to find a Christian community, I found the Baha’i community and was embraced
I sought the Lord and He heard and He answered
When I was in Brazil after my junior year, connected to friends everywhere and nowhere, feeling lost, God opened the door to the kindling of a relationship with my future husband
I sought the Lord and He heard and He answered
When I finished with Notre Dame and nursing school, unsure of how to continue a relationship long-distance, God opened doors for me to move back to Brazil and we were married there amidst beautiful springtime flowers…
I sought the Lord and He heard and He answered
That’s why I trust Him
That’s why I trust in God, my Savior
The one who will never fail
He will never fail
Oh, I trust in God, my Savior
The one who will never fail
He will never fail
I sought the Lord
When I arrived in Pittsburgh in January 2014 to spend time with Karis, after a long time apart and challenging communication due to her brain fog, I had rich days with her in the hospital, days before she left us…
I sought the Lord and He heard and He answered
I sought the Lord (and He delivered me from all my fears)
I sought the Lord (from everything)
And He heard and He answered, oh
That’s why I trust Him, that’s why I trust Him
When I was starting my life in Pittsburgh with Cesar, as we looked for jobs and a place to live…
I sought the Lord and He heard and He answered
When I struggled with infertility…
I sought the Lord and He heard and He answered
My precious miracle son, Caleb, now six years old
When I was living through the nightmare of Covid isolation with my family…
I sought the Lord and He heard and He answered
That’s why I trust Him, that’s why I trust in God
There are many other stories I could tell, but I want to share a moment recently when I felt that I failed to trust the Lord – my daughter was admitted to the hospital due to dehydration, and I felt that everything was out of control, my anxiety was heightened, and I thought this was a sign that I did not know how to trust the Lord.
My daughter Talita, 4, happy and well again.
I have realized that trusting the Lord is not about ME, but about THE LORD. He will never fail. Remembering these stories helps me with this blessed assurance.
But God’s discipline is good for us April 22, 2024
Hebrews 12:10-13 Our earthly fathers disciplined us for a few years, doing the best they knew how. But God’s discipline is always good for us … there will be a peaceful harvest of right living for those who are trained in this way. So take a new grip with your tired hands and strengthen your weak knees. Mark out a straight path for your feet so that those who are weak and lame will not fall but become strong.
I’m writing to you from the beautiful mountains of Colorado, where the new life of spring looks a bit different from Pennsylvania.
My takeaway today from thinking about this passage from Hebrews? God’s discipline is not just for my personal growth, but even more, for those around me. My right living can open a pathway of peace and strengthening for others. And so can yours.
It’s not just about “me”—it’s about us. We’re all influencing each other.
Sometimes I’m the weak and lame one who needs extra support.
And sometimes, because God gives me the extra infusion of perspective I need in order to keep hanging on when things are tough, other people can say, as many told me after Karis died, “If she could find grace to not give up, with all she had to deal with, I can too, with what I face.”
Sometimes, when I “strengthen my weak knees” through prayer and worship, the Holy Spirit can transform my pity party, as Karis called any kind of griping, into the ability to shift my focus away from myself to listen, understand, and pray for others.
This idea of “new grip” reminds me of a Notre Dame football story. Karis innocently sat at the football players’ table in the dining hall while they were all getting their food. The team “adopted” her, and she helped tutor some of them so they could stay academically qualified. One Saturday morning she was still in her PJs when she heard a knock on her dorm room door. One of the football players filled the doorway.
“Karis, hurry and get dressed. We’re playing touch football and I want you on my team. I promise, I won’t let you get hurt. I’ll wait for you in the common room.”
This is a funny story for so many reasons. Little Karis, who didn’t even understand the rules (that’s another story!) playing in any meaningful way against massive opponents? Without getting hurt?
What the football player did during play was hand Karis the ball, tell her “Hold it tight,” pick her up, and race for the touchdown.
I think you can tell where I’m going with this. Karis had only one task: hang on to the ball. The rest was all about trust.
We’re all team players, in some way influencing the outcome of the game we’re playing. The “ball” God is asking me to hold on to has everything to do with trust in his game plan and in the other players. I don’t even fully understand the rules, and the opponents I face are way too big for me. My part? Strengthen my grip and trust him to carry me.
Isaiah 25:9 (Isaiah 46:3-4, Malachi 4:2, Romans 5:10-11, Hebrews 4:15, 16, 2 Peter 1:1) In that day the people will proclaim, “This is our God! We trusted in him, and he saved us! This is the Lord, in whom we trusted. Let us rejoice in the salvation he brings.”
Trust isn’t easy, especially when we’ve been betrayed. When someone we have trusted has not just disappointed us, but has deliberately hurt us for their own ends. Because the Three-in-One God understands this, Jesus came, to experience in a body what betrayal is. That’s why we can go to him to find mercy and grace in our time of need. This is our God, not a being far off, but one who draws near, in compassion and full understanding. With healing in his wings.
2 Timothy 4:16-18 (Isaiah 51:1-3) The first time I was brought before the judge, no one came with me. Everyone abandoned me. But the Lord stood with me and gave me strength … and he rescued me from certain death. Yes, and the Lord will deliver me from every evil attack and bring me safely into his heavenly Kingdom.
What deliverance do you need today? Take it to the Lord. He stands with you.
I arise today, through God’s strength to pilot me, God’s might to uphold me, God’s wisdom to guide me, God’s eye to look before me, God’s ear to hear me, God’s word to speak for me, God’s hand to guard me, God’s shield to protect me, God’s host to save me From snares of devils, From temptation of vices, From everyone who shall wish me ill, afar and near.
I arise today Through a mighty strength, the invocation of the Trinity, Through belief in the Threeness, Through confession of the Oneness of the Creator of creation.
Isaiah 25:7-9 God will remove the cloud of doom, the shadow of death that hangs over the earth. He will swallow up death forever! The Sovereign Lord will wipe away all tears. … In that day the people will proclaim, “This is our God! We trusted in him, and he saved us! Let us rejoice in the salvation he brings.”
Psalm 68:5 Father to the fatherless, defender of widows—this is God, whose dwelling is holy. God places the lonely in families; he sets the prisoners free and gives them joy.
Revelation 21:4 God himself will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain.
To my surprise, when I walked into church yesterday, Josh was singing “Rock of Ages”! It had nothing to do with my last post–except for me. Josh chose the song based on Isaiah 51:1 and Matthew 16:18. You can listen to Kevin’s challenging sermon on those passages here. You might need to give Wes a day or two to post it.
But I felt chills. I don’t remember hearing that hymn sung in our church. It seemed God was saying back to me, “Remember what you just posted? You, Debbie, too easily forget the Rock who can hide you.”
On my mind was the strong sense that God wanted me to write something very difficult into Book 3, Facing the Faeries 1906, something I will weep over, in my emotional attachment to my characters. And for which I fear criticism and negative pushback. I need to write it this week–my personal little “cloud of doom.”
I took my dilemma to a prayer team. They understood that my challenge is to trust—to trust that God sets prisoners free and gives them joy—even the characters in this book to whom I am inordinately attached. Even me. This is what he does. God reminded me of my “year verse”: Be truly glad. There is wonderful joy ahead, even though you have to endure many trials for a little while (1 Peter 1:6).
As you and I head into the challenges of this new week, let’s take a few minutes to reaffirm our trust in the Lord, and rejoice! Here are three artists to help us, each inspired by Isaiah’s words, “This is our God”:
Debra Kornfield 